“I’ve never been very good with money.”
This is one of the most common things I hear my clients, and the women in my facebook group, say. We're all very good at focusing on the things that we don't think we're good at, along with coming up with reasons that validate why we're not the successes in business or our careers that we would like to be.
“I hate budgets.”
“I’ll never be a 6-figure earner.”
"I just can't stick to a financial plan."
“My market won’t pay premium prices.”
"Success always happens to other people, not to people like me."
"There's no point in even trying."
If you’ve ever heard these , or similar, statements come out of your mouth—or even in your head—then you’re engaging in a damaging habit known as negative self-talk. By telling yourself these lies (and yes, they are lies) you’re reinforcing the beliefs that go along with them.
What you visualise and believe is what becomes true.
Tell yourself that you’re not good with money, and you won’t be.
Tell yourself that you're broke, and you'll stay that way.
Believe that budgets and doing your accounts are horrible chores to be reviled, and you’ll resist creating one.
Convince yourself that you can’t earn a 6-figure income, and you won’t.
It’s not a secret, or “The Secret.” It’s a fact - known as a self-fulfilling prophecy, this kind of self-talk results in poor performance simply because we act as if it’s already true.
If you tell yourself that you’ll never be a 6-figure earner, you will not do the things that 6-figure business owners do, or you'll avoid forging your upward path in your career.
If you tell yourself that your business offering is not as good as someone else's. you won’t work to grow your mailing list (“No one reads my emails anyway”), you won’t increase your charging rates (“It’s not like I’m some top-earning guru”), and you won’t build a brand worthy of a 6-figure income (“I can't justify creating a beautiful brand at this income level”).
If you're talking yourself down, you're less likely to apply for that promotion, or make the move to a new role with a higher salary or better career prospects.
By contrast, if you act and think as if you already are a 6-figure earner, you’ll approach your business or your career quite differently. Your confidence level will increase. You’ll present a very different brand and persona to your prospective clients and contacts.
If you tell yourself that you have something worth offering, that is worth paying for, then you will go out of your way to connect with those who can and will afford to pay your higher rates. You'll embrace networking, and you will find that opportunities start coming to you without you constantly having to hustle and go looking for them!
How to Combat Negative Self Talk
OK, Kim, I hear what you're saying but how do I deal with it?
The first step towards changing your negative self-talk is to simply acknowledge that you do it. Tick a mental checkbox every time you catch yourself making negative statements, whether out loud or in your head. Write them down when they make themselves know, or put a note in your phone. Acknowledge them, and then you can deal with them. If you keep pretending that they're not there, they will continue to lurk, and you won't ever be rid of them.
Make a note of the ones that come up most often for you, and identify their origin if you can. For example, if your ex-husband continually berated you for your spending habits, chances are your “I’m no good with money” mantra can be laid right at his feet. It’s time to turn that thinking around. Or if you grew up in a household where money was scarce, it's likely this had an impact on your own attitude or expectation of money.
The next time you catch yourself saying “I’m rubbish with money,”, instead of looking for something that backs up that statement, take a minute to recall 5 instances where you were good with money. Maybe you paid off your credit cards or saved for a house or built an emergency fund.
See - you're not rubbish with money at all! Rephrase your self-talk to, “I used to be bad with money [if that’s true], but now I make smart choices to achieve my goals.”
Just as negative self-talk becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, so does positive self-talk. Reframe your thinking, and your business and your personal finances will certainly improve.
So, are you ready to change your focus? Instead of saying "I'll believe it when I see it", are you ready to flip that on its head and see what you believe....knowing that you believe you can do this?!
Dealing with your money mindset is the first part of the jigsaw puzzle. Once you start dealing with it, and getting it working with you, not against you, the rest of the pieces will fall into place much easier. If you're ready to take that first step, then why not jump on the Money Mindset Mastery Fast-track? - the possibilities for you in business and your future career progression are endless!
Still not sure if mindset is an issue for you? Grab my FREE money mindset checklist and see what resonates with you!
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